Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Crucial Conversations

     Any conversation has the potential to be a crucial conversation. In the book, Crucial Conversations:  Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High, the authors define such conversations as a discussion between two or more people where the stakes are high, opinions vary, and emotions run strong.  In one brief instant any conversation can become crucial.  While we may feel angry, scared, or hurt, it is important to look inward.  Locate your North Star, your original purpose.  Ask yourself these four critical questions: 


  1. What do I really want for myself?
  2. What do I really want for others?
  3. What do I really want for the relationship?
  4. How would I behave if I really wanted these results? 
Remember crucial conversations transform people and relationships.  It’s not my way or your way, it is a new way—a better way.

Patterson, K., Grenny, J., McMillan, R., & Switzler, A. (2002).  Crucial conversations:  Tools for talking when stakes are high.  New York: McGraw-Hill